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Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category

If you’re like me, the annual sight of blissfully happy couples on Valentine’s Day makes you ill. Not because of their cloying sweetness and dopey “eyes only for you” looks (though that’s part of it), but because you never get to join in. If your romantic life has stunk as badly as mine, you’ve often felt like that little kid looking in from outside the fence and wishing he could play, too, but never gets the chance.

Admit it: every Valentine’s Day is an annoying reminder of that. Don’t deny it, revel in it — wallow in the mire you yourself have created! Give in to the dark side…

And, while you’re at it, enjoy this Valentine’s Day report from The Onion.

You’re welcome.

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If you’re like me, the annual sight of blissfully happy couples on Valentine’s Day makes you ill. Not because of their cloying sweetness and dopey “eyes only for you” looks (though that’s part of it), but because you never get to join in. If your romantic life has stunk as badly as mine, you’ve often felt like that little kid looking in from outside the fence and wishing he could play, too, but never gets the chance.

Admit it: every Valentine’s Day is an annoying reminder of that. Don’t deny it, revel in it — wallow in the mire you yourself have created! Give in to the dark side…

And, while you’re at it, enjoy this Valentine’s Day report from The Onion.

You’re welcome.

Read Full Post »

 

If you’re like me, the annual sight of blissfully happy couples on Valentine’s Day makes you ill. Not because of their cloying sweetness and dopey “eyes only for you” looks (though that’s part of it), but because you never get to join in. If your romantic life has stunk as badly as mine, you’ve often felt like that little kid looking in from outside the fence and wishing he could play, too, but never gets the chance.

Admit it: you’re lonely and resentful, and every Valentine’s Day is an annoying reminder of that. Don’t deny it, revel in it — wallow in the mire you yourself have created! Give in to the dark side…

And, while you’re at it, enjoy this Valentine’s Day report from The Onion.

You’re welcome.

Read Full Post »

With California still caught in a harsh drought, aquarists must do their part to recycle water. PeckTec shows the way:

I may have to order a case. I wonder if they have “Sunset Platy Surprise?” 

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If you’re like me, the annual sight of blissfully happy couples on Valentine’s Day makes you ill. Not because of their cloying sweetness and dopey “eyes only for you” looks (though that’s part of it), but because you never get to join in. If your romantic life has as boring as mine, you’ve often felt like that little kid looking in from outside the fence and wishing he could play, too, but never gets the chance.

Admit it: you envy these people their happiness, and every Valentine’s Day is an annoying reminder of that. Don’t deny it, revel in it — wallow in the mire you yourself have created! Give in to the dark side…

And, while you’re at it, enjoy this Valentine’s Day report from The Onion.

You’re welcome.

(Edited 2/14/16 to rewrite a portion the way I had intended.)

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If you’re like me, the annual sight of blissfully happy couples on Valentine’s Day makes you ill. Not because of their cloying sweetness and dopey “eyes only for you” looks (though that’s part of it), but because you never get to join in. If your romantic life has stunk as badly as mine, you’ve often felt like that little kid looking in from outside the fence and wishing he could play, too, but never gets the chance.

Admit it: you’re lonely and resentful, and every Valentine’s Day is an annoying reminder of that. Don’t deny it, revel in it — wallow in the mire you yourself have created! Give in to the dark side…

And, while you’re at it, enjoy this Valentine’s Day report from The Onion.

You’re welcome.

(Reposted from last year.)

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Figures the cats are the Nazis.

Very creative. And never leave home without your hat. 🙂

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A Laphroaig Christmas

The good people at Laphroaig, one of many great single-malt scotches from the Isle of Islay, took some of the comments they received and set them to Christmas carols.

Brilliant. 🙂

 

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“Vegan strip club?” Do the dancers wear Birkenstocks instead of platform pumps?

“I’ll have a craft beer, kale chips, and a lapdance, please.” 😀

OOPS: Looks like the Tweet doesn’t always embed. Here’s an image, just in case:

Vegan strip club

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Or a case of cross-cultural unintended communications?

Regardless, look the official logo for the World Cup in Brazil and tell me that isn’t a face-palm:

That’s just marvelous. Brazil’s contribution to bad logo design. 😀

PS: If anyone happens by this cobwebby corner of the Internet, is the face-palm a gesture of embarrassment in Brazil? Or is this something a Brazilian would just not have noticed?

PPS: Once again, the embedded tweet has trouble displaying. If you don’t see it, try reloading, or just click the link.

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If you’re like me, the annual sight of blissfully happy couples on Valentine’s Day makes you ill. Not because of their cloying sweetness and dopey “eyes only for you” looks (though that’s part of it), but because you never get to join in. If your romantic life has stunk as badly as mine, you’ve often felt like that little kid looking in from outside the fence and wishing he could play, too, but never gets the chance.

Admit it: you’re lonely and resentful, and every Valentine’s Day is an annoying reminder of that. Don’t deny it, revel in it — wallow in the mire you yourself have created! Give in to the dark side…

And, while you’re at it, enjoy this Valentine’s Day report from The Onion.

You’re welcome.

(Reposted from last year.)

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This is hilarious:

😀

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Oh, this had me laughing. If you’ve ever heard the original or dealt with toddlers –or both– this one’s for you:

via Moe Lane

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And I haven’t a clue why:

 

Personally, I’d make t-shirts and sell them:

“My parents went to Fucking, Austria, and all I got was this lousy t-shirt!”

Come on, folks, vote “Nein!” 😀

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Google, never a company afraid to innovate, has decided to take it’s popular Maps site forward into the past, recreating those wonderful days when we were all playing King’s Quest on CGA monitors:

That, of course, was their Arpil Fool’s joke. Hah! 😀

Google often annoys the heck out of me as a company, but they do have a pretty good sense of humor.

PS: Speaking of King’s Quest, I really miss Sierra’s style of computer games.

 

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A Border Collie can’t understand why the statue won’t play:

Meanwhile, there’s a cat nearby thinking “Thtop it. You’re embarathing yourthelf, thtupid.” 🙂

 

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If you’re like me, the annual sight of blissfully happy couples on Valentine’s Day makes you ill. Not because of their cloying sweetness and dopey “eyes only for you” looks (though that’s part of it), but because you never get to join in. If your romantic life has stunk as badly as mine, you’ve often felt like that little kid looking in from outside the fence and wishing he could play, too, but never gets the chance.

Admit it: you’re lonely and resentful, and every Valentine’s Day is an annoying reminder of that. Don’t deny it, revel in it — wallow in the mire you yourself have created! Give in to the dark side…

And, while you’re at it, enjoy this Valentine’s Day report from The Onion.

You’re welcome.

(Reposted from last year.)

Read Full Post »

Here’s the list from Zagat’s. Several are laugh-out-loud-worthy, but “Phat Phuc” was the winner. I won’t ask to see the kitchen, thanks…

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I may have to create a new category for animal athletic events: first we had Cowboy Monkey Rodeo, then Wiener Dog Races, and now… Bunny Dressage!

That rabbits like to hop is hardly a secret. But now European rabbit enthusiasts have harnessed their bunnies’ natural talents to create a new spectator sport… rabbit showjumping.

Invented in Sweden in the early Eighties, Kaninhop involves bunnies bouncing their way around courses consisting of several small jumps of varying height and length.

Snoopy, a black-and-white bunny from the German city of Jena, is the star of the local Kaninhop club – and he makes spends his days leaping over all manner of barricades, jumps and rails.

‘Snoopy can jump 60 centimeters (about 2 feet) high,’ proud Claudia Fehlen, the 23-year-old founder of the Jena bunny hopping club, told Der Spiegel.

‘And he has done well in tournaments. He came in second once, and third another time.’

Over the past few decades to sport has spread far from its Scandinavian homeland and clubs have now sprung up in several other European countries, the U.S., Canada and even Japan.

And yes, we have video:

Be sure to click through to see photos of Snoopy and his pals in action.

What’s next? Armadillo bowling?

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Then you’ll love creepy Easter Bunnies:

MWAHAHA!! I have you at last!

Must be a Stephen King Easter. Click for the rest.

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