Merry Christmas!

I hope Santa brought all that you could desire. 🙂

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This is a case for CSI: Thebes!

His Majesty does not seem amused.

As in the capital of Ancient Egypt. It seems the mystery surrounding the death of Pharaoh Ramses III has been solved:

Conspirators murdered Egyptian King Ramesses III by slitting his throat, experts now believe, based on a new forensic analysis.

The first CT scans to examine the king’s mummy reveal a cut to the neck deep enough to be fatal.

The secret has been hidden for centuries by the bandages covering the mummy’s throat that could not be removed for preservation’s sake.

The work may end at least one of the controversies surrounding his death.

Precisely how he died has been hotly debated by historians.

Ancient documents including the Judicial Papyrus of Turin say that in 1155BC members of his harem attempted to kill him as part of a palace coup.

Apparently there was a dispute over which of his sons (from different wives) would inherit the throne on Papa’s death. The losing mother and son weren’t happy and arranged for Ramses to get a second mouth. The article is quite worth reading; the forensic work was impressive.

Oh, and the conspirators? They got theirs:

The trial documents[8] show that many individuals were implicated in the plot.[9] Chief among them were Queen Tey and her son Pentaweret, Ramesses’ chief of the chamber, Pebekkamen, seven royal butlers (a respectable state office), two Treasury overseers, two Army standard bearers, two royal scribes and a herald. There is little doubt that all of the main conspirators were executed: some of the condemned were given the option of committing suicide (possibly by poison) rather than being put to death.[10] According to the surviving trials transcripts, 3 separate trials were started in total while 38 people were sentenced to death.[11] The tombs of Tiy and her son Pentaweret were robbed and their names erased to prevent them from enjoying an afterlife. The Egyptians did such a thorough job of this that the only references to them are the trial documents and what remains of their tombs.

Some of the accused harem women tried to seduce the members of the judiciary who tried them but were caught in the act. Judges who took part in the carousing were severely punished.[12]

Pentawere looks to have been strangled in an execution, so it doesn’t appear he was allowed suicide. Perhaps he was granted the right to choose the manner of his death, in deference to his rank.  It seems some mercy was shown him since, as the BBC article mentions, it looks like the unknown youth buried with Ramses III is Pentawere, although his body wasn’t given royal treatment.

Still this would have let him enter the afterlife. Many of the other conspirators, however, weren’t so “lucky:” they were burned alive and their ashes scattered in the streets. In the Ancient Egyptian religion, this meant their souls were destroyed too, as only mummification allowed survival after death. Thus, it wasn’t just execution, it was utter eradication. (Sorry, no link. Saw it yesterday but can’t find it, now.)

Now that’s what I call “extreme justice.”

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And they say California is weird?

The happy couple.

We ain’t got nuthin’ on the Big Apple. I mean how can you top a fireman with a pre-op tranny prostitute “girlfriend,” both of whom had been accused and acquitted of strangling other transsexuals, including the girlfriend’s transsexual pimp?

Now they’ve both been acquitted of throttling transsexuals.

Kinky FDNY hunk Taylor Murphy, who successfully fought off felony strangulation charges brought by his jealous, blond, pre-op transsexual ex-girlfriend, is now dating another woman wannabe with a far more serious strangulation on her rap sheet.

Brunette pre-op transsexual Wanda Batista, 32, was all smiling and supportive of Murphy as she walked arm-in-arm with him at Manhattan Supreme Court last week, batting her eyelashes and calling him her “giant teddy bear.”

But in December 2004, the towering Batista was tried on charges she had fatally choked her transsexual pimp — and in a bizarre karmic twist, Batista was acquitted by a Brooklyn jury, just as her beefy fireman would be in Manhattan eight years later.

We in the Golden State are going to have to bring our A-game to beat this. Thankfully, we have San Francisco on our side.

Read the rest at the New York Post.

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Being proud of your beautiful bride is one thing…

Posting pictures of her in sexy lingerie on your wedding night is quite another…

They’ve just got married in an epic three-day event dubbed ‘Wedfest’.

And it would seem Chris O’Dowd is keen to show the world just how lucky he is in having the gorgeous Dawn Porter as his wife.

The Bridesmaids actor treated his 186,000 Twitter followers to a saucy snap of the 33-year-old journalist looking super-sexy in satin and lace underwear.

And just because I’m a tease:

You can visit the article for the rest, you lecher. (Whistles innocently…)

And, no, she wasn’t happy:

She joked on her Twitter page: ‘That wasn’t the wedding photo I was planning to release. #husbands!!!!’

“Joked?” Yeah, right. Him sleeping on the couch that night was her idea of a prank, too, I bet.

Meanwhile… Do you think she has a sister at home?

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