Archive for July 2nd, 2012

“Don’t eat me , bro!”

Well…. There were no human brains available, so what’s a mutant cannibal zombie to do?

 A man who was high on synthetic marijuana reportedly ate his family dog alive. Just as the “zombie apocalypse” hysteria began to subside, another man in a psychotic meltdown makes national news. Michael Daniel, a Texas man from Waco, was arrested for eating his family’s nearly 40-pound pooch, on Monday. He faces felony animal cruelty charges, according to police.

Daniel allegedly was “on his hands and knees and chased a neighbor while barking and growling like a dog,” according to KWTZ.

After his deranged behavior frightened his neighbors, he turned to his black dog that was sitting on the porch and beat and strangled the dog. When he had sufficiently injured the pup, Daniel began to eat him.

Sure it was “synthetic marijuana.” Sure. Just like in all the other cases…

What’s next? Zombie brain-eating gerbils?

Wait! The president has eaten dog, too! That means…

The horror!

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